Life with God is a curious thing. Good curious, but curious nonetheless. I am yet to find something that so overtly defies “logic” or something that is so multifaceted (yes, not even Kim Kardashian’s wedding ring). But life with God is good. And life with God is triumphant.
The reason I am able to say that it is triumphant is not because it is the overwhelming feeling that I leap out of bed with. As I’m gleefully ready to approach the day and just kick all the goals imaginable. Quite far from it, actually. But I am in a season that I am learning, crying and stumbling through some of the deepest heart revelations I have had yet and thought it apt to document the process.
Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
I’ve been a part of Youth With A Mission (YWAM) for over two years now, and although I try and communicate well what we do as an organisation, what my role is within it and what all these crazy acronyms mean I thought it might be helpful to have one reference page that can answer any of those inner wonderings you have.
"... According to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God." Ephesians 3:16-19.
Ahh, the great outdoors. The sights only accessible by foot, the mental challenges only brought on by fatigued legs & seemingly endless stairs. As a woman with the intense desire for having & securing “purpose”, sometimes I find myself asking myself why I’m walking up that stupidly steep mountain, just to walk down it… just to get somewhere that a road will surely pass by… But then I swallow my words, as accomplishment brought by pushing myself out of my comfort zone and taking a moment to breathe the untainted air, allows me to take in the hundreds of peaks and, in this case, snow-capped forests I am gazing upon.
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-21 (NIV)
There I sat. On my floor, early hours of the morning, surrounded by stuff. Overwhelmed.
If I owned a Fitbit®, my step goal would be thoroughly achieved. Walking, back and forward from the cupboard of choice to the cupboard of consequence.
Okay, it wasn’t that dramatic. But in passing weeks I have come to fully realise that God has healed me of a shopping problem*. That’s probably something you didn’t know about me, right? I have seemingly evaded many of the ‘Top 5 Sins That Grip Every Teenager’ (I don’t actually have a list), but everyone has a vice. If there is a void, it needs to be filled. And there is no scale on which one void filler is any better or worse than another…
Mine was shopping.
Where to begin.
An apology might fit well, and from there we can venture forth together.
Not an apology that I feel people are expectant of, nor even feel is necessary but it is an apology I wish to extend.
First of all, the year of 2016 has been a year where my view of God, myself and my relationship with Him, and consequently others, has done a triple-double-back-no-handed-spring-form-baking-pan flip with a nailed landing and a high score in the Olympics of Life (the first of many).
(But perhaps I’m still mid-air, but for the sake of this illustration we’ll leave it there).
God is good.
Such a gentleman and a super rad guy.
How I got to do this mega cool flip and land upon this understanding was through God’s grace, small steps and the enablement, prayer and support from those around me.
But here’s the problem, the technique, training and meticulous detail of this flip has not been shared. I’ve been unable to keep people updated on what I am learning, doing and how I am growing – basically, how I am seeing and experiencing God grab my hand and run with me.
Apprehension - a seemingly recurring theme of this week (/life in general, let’s be real).
When observing apprehension from the outside you would almost rather choose full-blown fear than to be apprehensive. (Cue apt verse about being lukewarm (Revelations 3:16)).
But amidst apprehension we accept it as normal. Just another characteristic of the human being.
But it is merely a state of emotion. A choice. A dwelling place, not a state of being.
I’m apprehensive about this ‘blog’.
I have procrastinated from it, I have found alternate reasons against it.
And furthermore I have convinced myself that it wasn’t necessary or of any importance, despite feeling God subtly nudge me towards it for a period of time longer than I’m willing to admit...
I’m apprehensive because I don’t feel like I have adequate time to make my writings articulate enough, profound enough, well-thought through or academic enough.
And I can hear a choir of people shouting at me ‘amen’.
For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse. Romans 1:20 (NIV)
We were surrounded by beauty and prompted to respond.
In a Worship Session on Fraser Island, bottom seated at an outlook over dunes, lakes and sea - glowing under vibrant moonlight.
With wind surrounding me from literally every direction, I breathed in and put pen to paper:
The rest of warm water,
the kiss of fresh morning,
the refreshment of a cool breeze
and the gentleness of these,
Is but a hint of who I am.
The beauty of this world
cannot begin to tell
an exact portrayal of the Great I Am.
Yet I give you these things
so that you might come to know Me more...